You got lucky this time.It doesn't take much to make Oklahomans star-struck. Most residents go apeshit whenever Trace Adkins comes to town. So when I heard Sarah Palin would be signing her new book, Going Rogue, at the Hastings in Norman, I knew the event would be big. Oklahoma Republicans' colossus of a voting block dwarfs our poor Democratic sand castle. Nevertheless, with such a polarizing figure coming to town, Oklahoma's small yet steadfast liberal contingent will undoubtedly make an appearance; they'll either have the book signed for the novelty, picket, drool from a distance or just watch the sheep in disgust. But I won't be there. Why? Because it's times like these that we "dangerous" liberals get a chance to show why we're better than the opposition -- we mind our manners.

Don't get me wrong, I despise Sarah Palin as much as the next lib. She represents the growing right-wing fundamentalism that has become the biggest threat to both the Republican party and the nation as a whole -- that anti-academic, anti-truth, anti-anything tripe that lines Rush Limbaugh's pockets. However, my desire to call out Sarah Palin on her bullshit takes a backseat to representing the left in the best way I know how: by behaving like I wasn't raised by spider monkeys. And it's never been easier with conservative decorum at an all time low. I thought Republicans' behavior couldn't get any worse than it was during the Presidential campaign. Wrong. The August town hall meetings were flat-out embarrassing for the GOP or at least they should have been. And if August was the appetizer, Joe Wilson served the roast in September. What happened to southern hospitality? What happened to standards? Well, they're alive and well, but reside in an unfamiliar abode: southern liberals.

Sure, every once in awhile Code Pink will crash a political rally, but left-fringe isn't like right-fringe. Left-fringe shouts at shoppers from a megaphone in a WalMart parking lot. Right-fringe pickets your gay friend's funeral. See the difference? One is a mild annoyance, while the other is being rude and inappropriate (that's the correct usage, just so you know Carrie Prejean).

Liberals have come a long way since their militant 1970s days. Most of my liberal friends would hit up the local micro-venue or the hookah bar before getting in people's faces over politics. I can't speak for those big city liberals, but here in Oklahoma, southern liberals eat a hearty breakfast, go to school/work, come home, put on a Flaming Lips record and check-out. Want to join us? Cool. You're conservative? Whatever, just don't harsh the mellow. And that's what it's like to be "dangerously" liberal in the Sooner State. We let you crash on the couch after the party, we speak courteously even to those we disagree with, we share new music and literature, and, most importantly, we live and let live. This is the new southern hospitality.

So, you liberals out there drafting your picket signs and spamming Hastings' event page, give the conservatives their damn book signing. They could use some fun. Between making shit up and yelling belligerently at people, being a conservative these days looks pretty exhausting. So, let's not stoop to their level. If you absolutely must see Sarah Palin, at least don't start any trouble. It's up to us liberals to be the stewards of southern hospitality now that conservatives have traded decency for shouting and hyperbole. Just dust off your copy of The Audacity of Hope and hit up your favorite coffee shop. Afterwards, you can bring your conservative friends some hot chocolate while they wait out in the cold for some diva to sign a book she didn't even write (see Lynn Vincent).